Kirkland’s bedrooms don’t necessarily boast the same proportions as its House spirit: sophomores, and juniors, give up your dreams of king-sized beds now. Close quarters build community, right?
The majority of Kirklanders live in either the main building or its adjacent annex, which is only partially connected to the rest of the House. Rooms feature wooden floors, fireplaces, and the occasional cockroach scare, unless you live on the Kirkland floor of DeWolfe housing. While DeWolfe has kitchens and central air, its residents—mainly sophomores—find themselves in an LDR with their new home their first year there.
If sophomores do live in the House, they’re likely to stay in cramped n housing. This is perhaps the one complaint that Kirklanders are willing to voice. But they still love it so much! So. Much.
Juniors and seniors are privy to Kirkland’s larger suites, as most juniors have n housing and the majority of seniors score n+1. There aren’t many designated “party suites” except for B-51/B-52, which also most notably hosts Incestfest. It’s exactly as it sounds.
As a River House with a prime location, Kirkland generally gets a good rep. The colonial architecture and the small, yet picturesque courtyard are some of the nicest among all twelve Houses.
The Kirkland dining hall is dominated by small tables that allow for a classy dining experience, except for when you spill food on your lap and have no napkins to clean up (the House Masters insist that the dispensers mar the beauty of the dhall). It’s also a social center for the House, and the HUDS staff have been known to pull food out for students at any hour of the night—that is, until it closes around 3 a.m.
In case they haven’t told you yet, Kirkland residents love their House and its quirks, such as “The Kirkland Guy,” an anonymous student who surprises residents with good deeds throughout the year. Expect to know the “Ode to Kirkland” by the end of Housing Day, whether or not you’re lotteried in—they’re that loud. House Stein Clubs are a bi-weekly tradition: expect loud music and dancing with a spirited crowd.
Kirkland will also give you the chance you meet the rich and famous. Three or four times a semester, the House hosts “Conversations with Kirkland”, where celebrities such as Shakira, Nate Silver, Michael S. Dukakis, and Felipe Calderón talk with students in the Kirkland JCR.
When you’re not busy mingling with celebrities, you can also hang out with the House Masters, Lowell Professor of Romance Languages and Literature Tom C. and Verena A. Conley, who are just as eccentric as their House. Both are always game to star in Kirkland’s semesterly drama production, and have two dogs that students enjoy taking for walks.
“You’ll never feel like a stranger walking into Kirkland,” said Raja F. Ghawi ‘15. The size of the House, one of the smallest on campus, immediately makes it feel more intimate and welcoming. And with traditions such as the beer-brewing club or the wine seminar led by Conley, you’ll never go thirsty.
One of the House’s most exciting traditions is a week-long Secret Santa in December, where residents spend the week putting together elaborate gifts for their randomly assigned “Santee.” In the past, gifts have included a flash mob, a gay pride parade, and a public striptease. The week culminates in the Kirkland Winter Formal, an alcohol-infused dinner in the dining hall, where seniors stand on top of tables to proclaim their love for the House.
After this dinner, residents proceed to B-51/B-52 for Incestfest, a House-wide make-out sesh—there is purportedly a competition for who can make out with the most Kirkland residents. The House brunch the morning after is likely the most awkward experience you’ll ever have.
One of Kirkland’s best perks is Hicks House, the House library, which was once the revolutionary war home of the patriot John Hicks. The rooms are full of character: the floorboards are uneven, and there are tables with carvings dating back more than 100 years. It’s the old Harvard of old Harvard.
Kirkland residents are hard-pressed to find, or at least talk about, the negatives of their House, but Kirkland isn’t perfect. Rooms are often smaller than those in other Houses, and some sophomores and juniors can find themselves in cramped doubles. And many of these rooms don’t even have good views, unless you like looking over the Kirkland loading dock.
Additionally, if you don’t feel an affinity with the excessive House spirit, it may take some time to get used to Kirkland—the community has been described as borderline cult-ish. You have to be in Kirkland to get Kirkland, so your friends might not understand when you tell them about some of the traditions. But if you don’t like House spirit, you might as well be in Lev, right?
Kirkland’s residents are ready to welcome you in on Thursday morning; in fact, it’s likely that they’ll be the first ones to arrive at the John Harvard statue, and as Ghawi said, “everyone who lives in Kirkland loves it”, so you will too.
Or at least they’ll try and make you.
Still want more information about Kirkland? Read more here!
